My country ‘tis of thee, is screwed most def-in-itely!
America is doomed, starting with this election cycle. I’ll go on the record right now and call it. Because, apparently, you can’t be an Internet Prophet without actually broadcasting a prediction ON the Internet these days.
Outright stupidity and mindless fanaticism have led to both parties fielding candidates who are blatantly corrupt, felonious in the extreme, or so shockingly incompetent that it truly baffles the mind that ANYONE would vote for these halfwits. And no, I’m not speaking about any one party; both parties’ candidates are terrible. The only way the candidates could be worse is if someone plucked them straight out of maximum security prison. (Which is where a few of them belong.) And here’s why…
The Republican Party
I’m only starting out with the Republican Party because they’re fielding the most outlandish group of people that have ever been seen in one place outside of an actual circus (which is what the Republican primary has become).
“The Donald” of Trumps
Donald Trump, what can be said about the man that hasn’t already been said by The Man, himself? You know, besides any of his ACTUAL positions on things or how exactly he’s going to make all his wondrous promises to the people a reality. Sure, he points out what a lot of people are ‘feeling’ about the state of the country but his plans on how to ‘fix it’ are absolutely lacking in details. “First off, I’m going to kick out all the illegals (all 11 million of them), then I’m going to build a wall along Mexico to keep the illegals from coming back because they’re all drug dealers, murderers, and rapists, and then, I’m going to make Mexico pay for it.”
Sure you are, Donald. Oh, and those drug dealers, murderers, and rapists aren’t going to be bothered by your cutesy little fence. Drug dealers are getting their drugs across via drug tunnels and waterway smuggling and last time I checked, tunnels aren’t stopped by walls… dips#it.
And murderers and rapists, well, there’s plenty of those who are native-born, so the fence isn’t stopping anything. Nice try. Rape and Murder aren’t Mexican inventions. Oh, and uh, Georgia, Alabama, and Arizona have already tried kicking ‘illegals’ out of their states (and out of all the ‘good-paying jobs that they’re taking from honest, hardworking Americans’). And it hurt them a hell of a lot worse than it helped them.
“I’ll renegotiate our terms with China because I know all the best negotiators.”
Newsflash, Mr Wiggy, the basic strategies that let a person ‘win’ at negotiating is to a) have all the cards, b) have what the other party can’t live without, or 3) have a perfect p-p-p-poker face. I’m talking the kind of bluffing that Batman gets away with until the Joker calls him on it in The Dark Knight.
Like the Joker, China will call you on it. China owns $1.2 trillion in U.S. debt (not the other way away around), China is the single largest cheap labor force in the world and is responsible for the largest production of the U.S.’ imported tech and manufactured goodies, and China is the most powerful economy, in terms of ACTUALLY PRODUCING GOODS, in the world. They’re already a nuclear power and are actively modernizing their military. They’ve got energy deals with Russia and own sizeable chunks of Canadian oil producers and pipelines. So what exactly does America have over China that will ‘change’ the economic tides, again? Oh. That’s right. They don’t have anything. It’s why China has turned into a bully in the South China Sea and starting to flex its muscle internationally. Because America doesn’t have anything they can do about it. China isn’t stupid, Mr. Trump. You can’t bullshit your way into regaining the global superpower title like you can in business. Ain’t happening.
Electoral assessment:
He’s only in the running because he’s a pompous big mouth who hasn’t been forced to actually explain how he’s planning on pulling all these Tea Party unicorns and miracles out of his a$$. Like the 21st century reincarnation of Hitler, he’s on the rise because he knows that Stupid People will believe anything, if you say the right Magic Words and ridicule others. Whatever.
Teddy Cruz
Now, Teddy is another interesting candidate that doesn’t make much sense, from the conservative perspective. Teddy Cruz is a Tea Party darling and has had his political currency rise in recent years for denouncing President Obama. Yet, HE was born in Canada in a similarly murky background that Obama was. Cruz’s daddy was here on a Student Visa, where he got to go to school in Austin, Texas and then, once his Student Visa ran out, applied and was granted political asylum….but didn’t apply for Citizenship. He then worked for several years in America, then moved to Canada where Papa Cruz and Mama Cruz met, were married, were granted CANADIAN citizenship and out popped little Teddy….a Canadian citizen. Fascinating.
Then to double down on the hidden Tea Party smearing that Teddy has done, he’s a lawyer. In other words, he hasn’t had an honest job in his life. He even defended a Chinese tire manufacturer who was sued for manufacturing tires that were based on blueprints that were stolen from a Florida manufacturer. Translation: He’s aided Communists in stealing from American businesses.
Electoral assessment:
He’s only in the running because he jumped on the F-Obama bandwagon early in Obama’s first term and says anything that appeals to Tea Party ‘Patriots’. Dude looks like a greasy Beaver the Cleaver clone who acts all nice in front of your parents and then turns into a manipulative a-hole who takes your lunch money, gives you a titty twister, and says inappropriate things about your sister when their backs are turned, knowing your parents won’t believe you if you say anything. He’s a walking Mouth and that’s about it. Whatever.
Marco Rubio
Marco is another curious contender for the Republican nod for the presidency. Neither of his parents were full-blooded U.S. citizens at the time of his birth, making him…. a dreaded ‘Anchor Baby’. The fact that his parents applied for citizenship after the fact is relatively moot in the party best known for looking for any way to ship all illegal alien dNA back to its country of origin.
He’s a career politician and lawyer, again, never having worked an honest job in his life. He co-sponsored a bill, while a legislator in Florida, that would’ve awarded in-state tuition rates to the children of undocumented immigrants. In 2002 (think: after 9-11), he helped to shoot down a bill that would have forced schools in Florida to report on the activities and associations that immigrants and foreign nationals might have while attending Florida schools. These were the same schools that were attended by a number of Jihadis who flew planes into the World Trade Center and the Pentagon. For representing a party that is notoriously ‘concerned’ with national security, he doesn’t seem to be getting the message.
Electoral assessment:
He’s only in the running because he’s a pretty boy career politician who has a silver tongue that can coax tears from the eyes of angels above. Whatever.
*****
The Democratic Party
And the other side of the ticket is just as blatantly corrupt and/or completely unelectable. But while the Republicans are comedically cartoonish, the Democrats are dangerously deluded. (I love alliteration!)
Burning Sanders
If Democrats were interested in truly winning the election by reaching across the ideological divide to find consensus, this dude would NOT be the answer that they’re looking for. For the party that has denigrated the Republicans for being the party of angry, old, white men, it doesn’t get any more angry, old, or white than Sanders.
And if you’re going to appeal to the broad majority of people who have actual jobs that they need to work to pay the bills, again, Sanders isn’t your man. He’s a 74 year old beardless hipster. And nobody in the real world likes hipsters. Sure, they might make some valid points on some topics but they aren’t exactly paragons of ‘individual success’ or stellar examples of people who are contributing anything worthwhile to society. (And no, sneering contemptuously at those who follow a more conservative ideology than you do or don’t like the same indie bands that you do doesn’t count as contributing to society. Sorry, not sorry.)
Besides, everyone knows that corporations and the wealthy own the political system. They certainly own both political parties and if you elect a president that is vehemently anti-greed, you can bet your ass that he’ll have any veto that he might issue on legislation overturned in a ‘rare’ moment of bipartisan agreement. (Come on, why did you really think that Ron Paul showed as poorly as he did in his last Republican primary? Because he wasn’t ‘sane’ enough? Pssh. It was because he wasn’t toeing the ‘wealth at any and all costs’ and ‘build up the military-industrial complex’ line that Sanders isn’t toeing in this election. So, the Republican party got smart and rigged the primary elections so they could get rid of him.)
You can either expect that Bernie’s veto will be overturned by a united Congress or you can bet that we’ll have another ‘J.F.K. moment’ and Hillary will still become president in the end. It’s not rocket science, folks. Whatever.
Electoral assessment:
He’s only riding a wave of popularity due to young hipsters and never-do-anythings getting all fired up about the concept of free goodies that ‘nobody has to pay for’ and by fighting a non-violent fight (is that even a thing?) against greed and political corruption. I think we all know how effective the ‘Occupy Wall Street’ movement was with their whole ‘non-violent protest against ‘fatcats’ on Wall Street in the hope of ‘shifting the paradigm’ on income inequality’. Incompetent jerkoffs got nothing accomplished and people stopped caring. Which is what will happen if Sanders gets elected.
Hillary Rodham Clinton, I mean, Hillary Rodham Clinton, I mean, Hillary Clinton. (Sooo many name changes she’s gone through and for such stupid reasons)
This is the most baffling figure in this year’s election. Largely because she has been unapologetically and deliberately deceptive, manipulative, and as flat-out self-centered and egocentric in her ‘career’ as “The Donald” has been on the Republican side of the aisle. How this candidate has managed to eke out a political career without generating a single compelling original thought or doing even an adequate job at ANYTHING she’s been tasked with in the political sphere is astonishing.
Despite working on the Watergate defense (arguably a kiss of death in the political realm for the sheer audacity of how sleazy one can get),
Despite being a fervent believer in the Republican tandem of Richard Nixon and Barry Goldwater (arguably the most underhanded and unethical Republican figures in recent history),
Despite being the president of the Young Republicans in college,
Despite being a strident feminist activist who married one of the most notorious philanderers in history (so much for not ‘settling’ for a man who sexually objectifies women!),
Despite HABITUALLY ‘losing track’ of nearly EVERY single record of inappropriate or unethical behavior while fulfilling her political duties (while always finding someone else close by to take the fall for her actions),
Despite her central involvement in Travelgate and Filegate,
Despite rampant cronyism in nearly ALL of her ‘professional dealings’,
Despite her unflinching support for the Iraq War,
Despite her absolute failure and complicity in the deaths of those she was responsible for at Benghazi,
Despite the highly unethical/borderline criminal nature of her ‘private’ servers being used to conduct classified government business while forcing the resignation of staff that she oversaw for doing the same kind of thing,
Despite the highly unethical nature of her and her husband’s foundations (especially one where their foundation reaped millions of dollars as she greenlit and strong-armed political action to allow Russia to own up to a fifth of America’s strategic supply of uranium, a BLATANT conflict of interest and treason, to boot),
Despite being a warmonger who has consistently pressed for military intervention (notably Libya) outside of congressional authorization (a clear violation of the War Powers Act),
Despite gathering a substantial portion of her war chest from Wall Street bankers and financiers while touting how ‘hard’ she’s been and how ‘hard’ she’s ‘going to be’ on Wall Street greed and corruption (and having a son-in-law who is one of the Wall Street bankers in question is proof of how loathe she is to look the other way, as far as bankers are concerned *sarcasm alert*).
Despite all this, she is still considered to be the ‘best’ Democratic candidate for president? I thought Democrats talk about ‘fighting against the Authoritarian ‘Man’ who wants nothing but War and Riches and will stop at nothing to get them’. I also thought that the Democratic party is typically the party of non-violence, of those who ‘yearn for an idealistic utopia founded on the moral code of the upstanding and virtuous man and woman who live in harmony with nature’.
Yet, here you have a woman who voted for the Iraq war, advocated for military intervention in Libya without congressional approval, has voted for the U.S. Patriot Act, one of the most egregious attacks on civil liberties in the history of the world, has a number of foundations that are profiting off of selling strategic military resources to one of our oldest enemies (a resource that is absolutely destructive to Nature and Life as we know it), has proven time and again that she is willing to do anything and everything to attain power while being reckless with privileged and classified national intelligence, and is the political equivalent of The Kiss of Death to those she comes across.
(It’s odd how so many of her business associates end up dead or in prison, yet she remains lilly-white…. except for that pending FBI investigation that should, if justice were something that occurred in America, wind up with her in jail).
Electoral assessment:
She’s only made it this far because she’s being bankrolled by the same financial force that has ruined this political system. She’s a puppet of Wall Street and the Corporate establishment.
She’s only made it this far because she’s seen as a sufferer (or an enabler) of Bill’s consistent infidelity and some groups give her the pity vote (which she’s milked) while some others give her the man-I-sure-wish-my-woman-could-be-like-that-when-I-screw-around-on-her vote (which she’s done nothing to dissuade as she rides Bill’s political coattails to further her own political ambitions). I’ve listened to the chatter on ‘the streets’. This is where she’s picking up certain ‘key demographics’ that seem peculiar for a Rich White Woman to pick up. If it was a mystery to you up to this point, now you know why. You’re welcome.
She’s only made it this far because dumbass ‘feminists’ see her as the ‘prodigal daughter’ who might be able to break into the ‘Men’s Only Club’ of the Presidency. They’ve become so goddamn blind to the method by which she’s done so, that they’re making a horrible mistake. She can ‘advocate’ all she wants on the ‘rights’ of women and children and this or that group, but the simple fact remains that she has always been a manipulative little viper who has milked public sentiment and sold out any and everyone who has crossed her path to get to where she’s at.
Is this really the standard by which all women should look at and say, “yes, I’m proud of her accomplishments as a Woman who blazed The Path we can all follow to change the world”? So your counter to men using dishonorable tactics, corruption, and blatant incompetence to destroy the world is to elect a woman who has done the EXACT SAME THING using the EXACT SAME METHODS? What the fuck is wrong with you?
(Why not Elizabeth Warren as the first female President? Or Kirsten Gillibrand? Claire McCaskill? Kathleen Sebelius? Why not go with a woman who can unequivocally claim that their political accolades and success didn’t come directly from their husband’s political clout? Why not someone whom the electorate can look back at their presidency and say, “Man, that was a great idea, voting for a Woman of Character to lead this country isn’t such a bad idea after all!” instead of saying, “Wow, we really should have examined her record. Had we done that and not voted for her, all these terrible things wouldn’t have happened and women wouldn’t have gotten the bad name in politics that they’ve gotten now.” (I’m speaking from the future here.)
Voting for Hillary because she’s the ‘most (in)famous woman’ is like voting for Trump because he’s the most (in)famous man. It’s a monumentally bad decision.)
Whatever.
*****
And THIS is why America is so royally f&cked. Because NONE of the leading candidates are worthwhile human beings. They aren’t upstanding pillars of how leaders ‘could’ or ‘should’ be. They’re career lawyers and backstabbers. They’re a pack of liars and thieves who have sold out this country and/or their fellow Americans when it mattered most. You can’t look at the mess that’s been created by a bunch of morally bankrupt, opportunistic, two-faced weasels and say ‘it’s a terrible thing that they’ve done’ and then elect the exact same type of weasels to FIX the mess. You’re only making the problems worse.
They aren’t going to offer any tangible solutions to get us out of This Mess. They’re a bunch of egomaniacs and despots waiting for their chance to seize power and never let it go. To become immortalized by history. And, unfortunately, one of them is going to be president unless you asshats do something about it. Which you won’t, because you’re just stupid enough to believe that they’ll be ‘better for the country than the other candidate’ but think you’re ‘smart’ enough to think your choice is the ‘only smart one’. When, in reality, they’re the exact same thing, they’re just dressed in a different wrapper.
Get a clue before it’s too late. Your children and their children after them and so on… will suffer the fruits of your blooming collective idiocy.
And for those who don’t read, you can watch the same arguments here.
Damien James 